Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Celebratory Society

Celebratory Soceity

When I was interviewed by The Globe and Mail two years ago for a piece about blogging and infertility, I was asked why a blog? Why did I feel the need to 'let it all hang out' so to speak? And my answer then was the same as it is today: I started this blog for me. I needed a place to record my thoughts and feelings, our process, the tests, medications, tears, pain, etc. that we all deal with when we first venture into the vast land of infertility. I said it then and I'll say it again, "If I get readers, great! If not, well, that's okay too. I just need to do this for me."

Little did I know that so many others were out there who could relate to me. Who wanted to read about our journey. Who could possibly learn something from what we were going through. And who might discover that infertility isn't as taboo as our society seems to try to make it.

Little did I know that so many of you would follow along and cry with us at our failures and cheer with us when Petite was born last August.

Little did I know that so many of you would also touch my soul.

Case in point, Max and Vee. I have become very close with Vee over the last couple of years. And Max's death is still so raw, so heart wrenching. I am still coming to terms with it myself and the tears still flow freely. For these two people and their love have touched me greatly and I count them among my friends, even though they live so far away.

So it is in the spirit of Festschrift that I open the floor to you. Mel, our dear Stirrup Queen has proposed The Celebratory Society to all of us as a way to celebrate the people in the blogosphere who have touched us in one way or another. As Mel says, she has no qualms about admitting how self-indulgent this is. And I have to agree! But there you have it. The floor is yours. Think of this as the most interesting delurking project you'll ever participate in. Tell me what my blog or actions mean to you. And then do the same on your own blog, add it to the master list and give me the chance to tell YOU what you have meant to me.

Contacting Vee
For those of you who got lost in the shuffle when Vee went password-protected, please e-mail me your own e-mail address and blog link. I will pass them all on to Vee and ensure that she is aware that you are thinking of her. Max's memorial will be on Friday morning in their hometown in Australia and as mentioned, donations in his memory should be made to the Rainbows for Kate Foundation. We love you Max, and we miss you more than words can say.


Kir said...

Your explanation is exactly why I love you and your blog. I found you just recently through the WHAT IF project.

You have a HUGE heart and a beautiful way of saying what we are all thinking, that's what I love about reading you...that I belong, even sitting here, so far away.

my condolences to Vee, I have been thinking of her and her beautiful boy and their profound loss. Please send my love across the ocean to her.

LadyofAvalon56 said...

I can't say what it was the drew me here, but it was probably Pam referring to you in her blog. However, I have always loved the way you wrote what was in your heart and I have cheered along with you each and every step of the way.

Of course, being a fellow Newf just makes things all the more appealing! I loves ya, maid! ;o)

(Don't bother linking back to my blog - it's kinda defunct).

Lollipop Goldstein said...

I cannot eat pancakes without thinking of you :-) Isn't it an incredible world where two people who might have never met otherwise, come together and one becomes this weekly-ish reminder every time the other sits down to pancakes (even when it isn't Shrove Tuesday--is that the right day?). You have an enormous heart, Gil, and I am so glad you have your daughter to pass along your pancake tradition.

Keiko Zoll said...

Gil, I first met you over a year ago, on Livejournal, just days after my diagnosis and when I sought out the infertilee communities on LJ. I was so lost, so overwhelmed, and I remember that you reached out to me. Yours was the first infertility blog I found... and the rest is history from there.

Gil, I am so grateful for finding you, and for reaching out to another wandering, lost infertile as she tried to figure it all out. Your blog, your story, and your heart give me hope and strength. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Hannah Wept, Sarah Laughed

Wishing 4 One said...

Well according to the amazing women here who commented you are amazing too. No doubt. I am new here and I look forward to reading your blog. My heart goes out to Vee... xoxo

Anonymous said...

I don't remember how I found you. I appreciate all of your support through the years. I hope one day, we will meet with our girls.

Please give my love to Vee. I read her before the password and my heart breaks for her.

ultimatejourney said...

I, too, started my blog as an outlet for my thoughts and feelings. At the time, I had no idea the IF community that exists but I'm so glad I managed to get connected.

I have loved reading about your journey to have a baby, and I only wish it would've been a little shorter and easier for you. But our families are what they are because of the road we travelled. And I know neither of us would have it any other way.

Kakunaa said...

I am finding you through this project for the first time, so I went and read some posts. You are....wonderful. You are an advocate, and you have your finger on the pulse of the community. Your story about Vee and Max made me weep. I had heard about it, but was unaware of their story....I feel that connection now, and I am glad that I have found your blog and the amazing insight you have to provide. thank you.

Nearlydawn said...

I came here to support you, because you were having several issues I could identify with. At the time you were scared you'd NEVER EVER find your way to being Mom.

I got hooked because I too am affraid of needles, but damn it they are a necessary part of this evil IF journey. I felt the need to cheer you on. Also, you gave me GREAT needle stories to tell my RE nurses while they stuck me for the 2nd time, 3rd time, called another nurse... rinse, wash, repeat.

Well to be fair... I stayed because you are pretty darned wonderful, and I wanted to support you. I so wanted you to be a success story in this world of IF - and here you are.

I also wanted to count you in my list of friends, and after a year, I think that goal is met. I speak of you as a friend.

Hugs. Thanks for being here and sharing, advocating, and being you.