We still have a great deal of this cake frozen in our freezer. There's a tradition that we have (huh, funny how our traditions seem to refer to food all the time; see Pancake Day Traditions for another one) that requires you to keep a portion of your wedding cake to eat on your first wedding anniversary. I've also heard that you eat a portion of it when you have your firstborn's christening. Let's just say I'm not holding my breath to fulfill THAT one.
This cake was baked by my Aunt L after many trial and error attempts. The thickness had to be just right. The circumference had to be perfect. And I knew she would do it wonderfully. It is my favourite cake and when I introduced hubby to it, he agreed, hands down, that it would be our wedding cake. (Well, one of two. Long story!) In case you'd like to bake this cake yourselves, here is the recipe. It's usually a hit when I bring it to office events and the like.
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Apricot and Raisin Cake
First, prepare the fruit mixture…
INGREDIENTS
2 cups of water
¼ cup sugar
½ cup raisins
½ cup dried apricots (snipped into tiny pieces)
METHOD
1. Bring these ingredients to a boil.
2. Reduce heat and cover.
3. Simmer 15 to 20 mins.
4. Drain and let cool.
Then prepare the cake batter…
INGREDIENTS
1 cup butter (softened)
8 oz. package of cream cheese
1¼ cups white sugar
4 eggs
1½ tsp. white vanilla
2¼ cups flour
1½ tsp. baking powder
METHOD
1. Cream butter and cream cheese well.
2. Gradually add sugar and continue to beat well. (Batter should be almost white and light.)
3. Add eggs one at a time and continue beating.
4. Add vanilla.
5. Add flour and baking powder.
6. Stir in fruit mixture.
7. Turn batter into a greased tube pan for baking.
Bake at 300° (F) for 65 to 70 mins.
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Anyway, when hubby and I were married in August 2004, we had many hopes and dreams. As we cut this cake, we believed in ourselves, our love and our future. We believed that the whole TTC thing would work out. Well, it hasn't. Today, I feel hurt, jaded, angry, doubtful and frustrated. I have no hope whatsoever that this cycle will work. None. Zip. Zilch. Nada. I may as well go buy myself a bottle of Captain Morgan now.
For those of you wondering, I did ask my RE to do a reference for us to MTL. We chose MTL for a few reasons: proximity, cost, and affiliation with our RE's office. (No, our RE doesn't do IVF or ICSI. He's just one man in one office doing the best he can for most folks who only need IUIs.) We'll see where it goes. If in the future, Ontario decides to foot the bill for IVF, then we can look at coming back to Ontario. Until then, for cost-efficiency, MTL is the place we'll go.
This morning, we saw 5-6 little follicles on the screen, one dominant at over 7mm. The others ranging from 4-6mm. And the endometrium is thin (as I would expect on CD8). He gave me a shot of Pure.gon and I have an appointment on Thursday. This is our last kick at the can before pulling out the big guns. I need all the luck, wishes and prayers I can get. I really want to be able to have a piece of our wedding cake on the day of our child's christening.
