Monday, March 23, 2009

I Gave In

Yesterday I gave in.

At 17 weeks 5 days, I finally bought a few items of maternity clothing.

I popped out to Motherhood Maternity at a local shopping centre and picked up a pair of simple black pants (boot cut) and two summery blouses, one a lovely green that makes my reddish hair colour pop, and the other a pretty cream, olive and peach flowery thing with a bit of lace around the hem and neckline that I fell in love with. Today, for the first time, I wore maternity clothing (the pants) to work, and not just my regular clothing with the tummy sleeve (aka bella band) that I've been making do with until now.

Can you spell "relief" boys and girls? I knew you could!

Honest to heaven, I was so much more comfortable today! I feel like in the last week or two my belly has expanded to incredible proportions and it's become a point of absolute necessity to look for other clothing. Some of my regular shirts are still okay of course, especially those with empire waists and the like. However a few pairs of pants cannot come close to closing around my belly. They fit great in the legs and the ass, but around the tummy? No way! It's downright painful to even try! Frankly, It's starting to get blatantly obvious that I'm "in the family way!" I went back today and picked up an orange coloured T-shirt for summer and a pair of brown pants that will be great when warmer weather hits.

On Wednesday, we have the first of six prenatal classes. I'm still thinking it's way too soon to do anything like that but apparently they advise that you at least start them around your 18th week, and I hit that mark tomorrow. So we'll give it a shot. I still feel like an imposter though. Does that feeling ever go away when you're infertile? I dunno. It's still hard to relax though and enjoy this.

However, that was the exact advice I got from my local RE today. He called bright and early this morning to let us know that he had just received the faxed RAD results and that everything looked perfect. He was genuinely happy for us; I could hear it in his voice. This is the same man who did all our IUIs and who's seen us through 5+ years of TTC. "Gil, you can relax. I promise. It was a pure false positive. The tests on the pertinent chromosomes (aka 13, 18 and 21) are all normal. Try to enjoy this." I countered with, "If the RAD results came back negative, is there ANY POSSIBLE way that the full results that we get in 2 weeks or so could show something different?" He said, "No. Because you already tested negative for spina bifida and neural tube defects, that's been ruled out. And now we've ruled out Down syndrome. So you can truly relax. Please. Try to enjoy this. You've both worked so hard for it and come so far; you need to enjoy this."

He's right. It's long past time I enjoy this.

I think I'm going to put together the nursery furniture this week.

Oh yeah... and how appropriate that hubby and I took Petit to his/her first concert! Great Big Sea played here on Saturday night and we had an absolute blast! The baby Newf likes Newfie music too; I felt a kick or two during some of the most rollicking songs! WOOT!


Carrie said...

Yes - the first time I wore maternity pants I was all "HEAVEN!!!" Sadly, I'm now at 28 weeks and even they drive me crazy... nothing can rub on the tummy. If a seam is digging in *at all*, the baby gets pissed. I'm thinking we're pretty lucky to be pregnant at this time though... soon it will be warm enough to wear dresses and sandles so nothing rubbing on the tummy AND no having to bend over to put on socks/shoes. Getting dressed is exhausting.

And yes... please enjoy this. I know it's hard and scary as hell and no, you will never be a "normal" pregnant person (or a "normal" mom) because of infertility. But what you have happening right now is amazing and to live in fear during the entire pregnancy takes away the joy of it.

Heather said...

I LOVE maternity pants. I wish I could wear them always.

Sadly, they are now my Thanksgiving Pants.

Neeroc said...

What Heather said - lol. Hubby was afraid I was never going to wear pants with a zipper again. (and it was a close call).

I hope you can enjoy this - even just a tiny bit. Actually, hell no. Revel in it. Rub your belly, love Petit, enjoy your pregnancy!

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